YOU READ THE TITLE!!!!
It’s true! I’ve been doing everything I can to work with the over 21 venues to allow minors into a meet and greet, and all but one (Boise) was able to accommodate (no shade to Boise, liquor laws are tough!). This means that I am upping the ante on these VIP passes.
Yep. ON TOP OF a polaroid of us in front of a giant rainbow, unlimited selfies, a laminated pass that will last forever, I’m also gonna do a song or two with my acoustic guitar during the meet and greet and serenade the shit out of you.
You can get your ALL AGES pass here: YOW! YES! ALL AGES!
I am super excited about this and I am also hopeful for the day that music venues don’t penalize people under 21 that want to watch music.

Here are ticket links!!!! YAY!!!!
8/25- Syracuse, NY- New York State Fair- Get Tickets
9/3- Nashville, TN- Church Street Block Party- Get Tickets
10/21 – San Diego, CA – The Casbah – Get Tickets
10/22 – Los Angeles, CA – Bootleg Theater – Get Tickets
10/24 – San Francisco, CA – Cafe Du Nord – Get Tickets
10/26 – Boise, ID – Neurolux – Get Tickets
10/28 – Eugene, OR – WOW Hall – Get Tickets
10/29 – Seattle, WA – The Crocodile – Get Tickets
10/30 – Portland, OR – Mississippi Studios – Get Tickets
11/8 – Columbus, OH – A&R Music Bar – Get Tickets
11/9 – Indianapolis, IN – The Hi Fi – Get Tickets
11/10 – Chicago, IL – Beat Kitchen – Get Tickets
11/12 – Toronto, ON – The Drake Hotel – Get Tickets
11/14 – Philadelphia, PA – World Cafe Upstairs – Get Tickets
11/15 – Boston, MA – Sonia’s – Get Tickets
11/17 – New York, NY – Highline Ballroom – Get Tickets

The Everybody is a Babe Tour begins in October!!! Tickets go on sale on FRIDAY August 11th!!! Can you even stand it?!? Stupid excited for this run. It feels like I haven’t toured in a million years. And truthfully, I don’t imagine I’ll be doing a tour like this for awhile. There’s so much to create and foster in my life (super not so secret sidenote: working on a second LP, a fashion line, and a new collection of poetry), and being on the road is one of the greatest joys that is easy to take for granted, especially when it feels like you are somewhat forced to be touring. In reality, touring is a gift. It is a gift to be an artist full-time, it is a gift to create, it is a gift to share. Yes, music is a job for me and many folks I know, but fuck if it isn’t a joy, you know? Lucky lucky lucky, I am. What a life.

I am slightly embarrassed that I’m only just now getting to the blog, BUT YO, life has been insane in the queer membrane, y’all. I independently released Bold on May 5th, and a super queer super fun music video featuring Sara Ramirez (babe alert paging dr. callie torres) and a star-studded cast was released today! Watch here:

What’s that, you say? You want to cry and dance?
You can buy the EP at these places:
iTunes
Amazon
Google Play
or stream on Spotify

Also, I performed “Know Your Name” on Good Morning America:
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/mary-lambert-performs-live-gma-47045711

More updates to come! I LOVE YOU, my little peanut cookies.

xoxo

M

Over the course of the last few months, the Dakota Access Pipeline has been etched in my mind as one (among many) painful realities of this sci-fi novel we seem to be living in. In conjunction with Al Gore’s Climate Reality Project, I decided to record a song that was true in the 1970s, and has only become increasingly relevant since then. Donald Trump has vowed to completely dismantle the EPA, “cutting it by 70%” in an attempt to reconcile the national debt. As the increasingly horrifying dystopian future we are living in unfolds, I am afraid of what people believe are truths and what is false. The EPA holds 1% of the national debt. It is a fallacy that dismantling an institution THAT PROTECTS THE ENVIRONMENT will be beneficial for anyone besides wealthy business owners. Scott Pruitt, someone that LITERALLY IS NOT CONVINCED HUMAN-MADE CLIMATE CHANGE EXISTS is our new head of the EPA. Climate change is undeniable, is human made, and can be helped. The future is depending on us, and we are failing. The DAPL shit-show wouldn’t exist if we were able to shift our reliance from fossil fuels to cleaner energy. This is where we live. This where animals and plants and trees live, where our children live. Protecting the environment isn’t a liberal-hippie-schtick, it’s fucking reality that effects all of us. For more information about protecting your home, health, and your family (also known as protecting the earth), check out these sites:
https://www.climaterealityproject.org/
http://earthjustice.org/
http://www.ucsusa.org/
http://www.worldwildlife.org/

My babies! It’s here! It’s queer! It’s my Kickstarter!
(Check the link here to bypass my long-winded newsletter)

For the last year, I’ve been polishing this EP and getting it ready to release to the world, but hit a financial roadblock, and had to put moving forward on hold. I briefly considered signing to a record label, but ultimately felt that a partnership with a company would not be in my best interest, creatively and logistically. So I have decided to come to you, dear reader! I believe that YOU are the record label I have been looking for. I am so grateful to be an independent artist, and to have the anxieties of making music solely for-profit out of my life, but realistically, I need some capital to get this project out of my room and into the world.  

I posted a blog this last weekend about the peculiarity of promoting a pop record in the state our country is in, and feeling strange about it. Someone on my Facebook posted that they were doing intensive activism work in support of the resistance, and played my music while doing grueling paperwork, and that made me hopeful and less anxious about the prospect of promoting my music in this climate. My contribution to the good fight might not look like other’s activism, but maybe being unashamed and proud of who I am and what I create is it’s own resistance.

It occurred to me that the whole point of all of this- sharing music, touring, even promotion- is about connection. It is about facilitating something beyond the traditional artist-to-fan relationship. It’s not about “collecting fans” or facebook likes, it’s about expression as a conduit to create something unquantifiable and dismantling the commodification of performers and artists. My intention is for the art to be a catalyst in someone else’s healing, to be a friend, and to be an harbinger of kindness. As a creator, I deeply value that connection, and when I start to feel inadequate or that my contributions might not be valuable or “enough”, I think of your stories. I remember the people that came to the first shows I had and cheered me on even though I thought it may not have mattered, I remember the poetry slams and snaps, I remember the emails from girls in rehab for eating disorders when I released “Body Love”, I think about the couples who used “She Keeps Me Warm” as their first dance, the gay Christians who felt a friend on the radio, those with a mental disorder feeling a little less crazy hearing a pop song reclaiming bipolar disorder, I remember the plus-size girls who wore a crop top for the first time and owned that shit. It moves me. It makes this journey feel so much more than vanity or ego. And maybe the whole point of vulnerability, at it’s core, is about humanity.

I know this newsletter has been a rambling stream of consciousness and not even filled with one kitten photo (here’s one! Phew!),

meow meow meow happy happy

So here’s the meat and potatoes:

My kickstarter will run for 31 days, and the money will go towards mixing, mastering, designing, printing, duplicating, and promoting the EP. There are some AMAZING rewards that I am so so so excited about fulfilling: obviously the physical EP, and a download before anyone else gets it, but there are also exclusive rewards that I’ve never done before. At a high reward tier, you can get a fancy dinner with you and a friend and me and probably at least one serving of pasta. Because, pasta. There’s also a reward I am super giddy to ship out (and shop for): Femme Magic- which has some of my favorite things: Lipstick, books, albums, scarves, and snacks. And if you are in need of some ML merchandise, there’s the superfan bundle which has literally every piece of media I’ve created.

I also wanted to give you a track list of the super gay super fun EP so you can be as stoked as I am! There’s even a song my mom wrote and sang on!! WHAT?! YES! There’s also a fun pop song where I say “lady” a bunch of times, and an older song called “I’d Be Your Wife”. Ugh, I’m so pumped for this release and to dance around! Just in general! I love dancing! I’ll be touring this EP in the fall and we can all hang out together and WHEEEEEEE I CANNOT WAIT

Bold

1. Do Anything
2. Lay Your Head Down
3. Hang Out With You
4. Know Your Name
5. I’d Be Your Wife
6. Love is Love (ft. Mary Kay Lambert) (MY EFFING MOM)
7. Know Your Name (The Reverb Junkie Remix)

I love you all so so much and I wish I could hug every single person and bring each one of you a donut. Or a vegan donut. Or a carrot. If you are staying away from refined sugar.

xoxo forever and ever amen,
Mary

Angels,

I don’t even know where to start. It is a strange world we live in; My heart oscillates between fury,   despair, resilient hope, exhaustion, engagement, and back to fury again. But there is certainly and most always a heaviness I cannot shake. Mostly, the feeling is- where do I begin? How can I use the platform I have to reject hatred and narrow-minded thinking without being hateful or narrow-minded myself? How can I exercise empathy and kindness when there is injustice, and a major faction of people supporting that injustice? Is there a part of me or my lifestyle that is contributing to pain in others? My fear for this country does not only lie with the current fascist regime of the T***p administration, but for staunch supporters of this regime as well. How can I begin to understand someone’s thought processes and viewpoints without my own biases and traumatic stressors being triggered and inviting judgement? Could I really see myself going to lunch with someone who would reject refugee children? Then claim that rejection is in the name of safety? Also, HOW THE FUCK am I supposed to promote music right now? It seems so trivial.

I just don’t know. I don’t know where this ends- but I am deeply afraid for our country, for the earth, and our future. It does feel like we’ve woken up in a dystopian twilight zone, on the brink of WWIII, and then I all I want to do is hide. Curl on the couch in heaps of blankets next to the cat and my partner and pretend that there is no pain outside. And I know that not only that desire, but the ability to hide, is it’s own kind of privilege; something that contributed to the tangled evil and seemingly impending doom. But I have to believe that humankind can and will demand better, more loving action and rhetoric from our chosen leaders. And music can also act as a part of that dismantling; Radical self-love and vulnerability, especially from artists, especially from marginalized people, is the nemesis of active oppression. I remind myself these things- and also understand that I may not be able to always show up in the way that others can, and that my contributions to the upheaval of tyranny may look differently than some, but if I remain as engaged as possible, alive and awake, and intentional with my work, then that is the best kind of combat I can think of. One of my favorite quotes of all time is:

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
– Howard Thurman

I’ve been working on my EP, called Bold, and will be announcing a Kickstarter campaign on Monday. Again, I am grappling with the bizarre notion that creating, releasing, and promoting a pop record in the state our country is in, could even remotely be somehow…important? Or helpful? I’m not sure. Maybe that is a comfort I am telling myself to feel better about this potentially tactless act? Nonetheless, I have to trust my instinct, and my instinct says that being a shameless fat, bipolar lesbian is it’s own kind of “fuck you” to the patriarchy and the systems that are in place to keep people quiet.

Stay safe, stay awake, and protect your heart. There is still love in this world (also chocolate cake!). I care deeply about all of you and I am glad you are alive, because sometimes the hardest thing is just getting out of bed, sometimes survival is the most radical thing we can do. Stay alive.

Love and light,
Mary

Yay yay yay yay! I am so excited to show off some new merch! I will ship it to you ANYWHERE IN ALL THE LAND. Here is a link to the merch store!

You can now purchase the bandanna with Body Love in my handwriting.

Girl, go ahead and ugly cry all over this shit

Or maybe you want a neat something to hang on your wall! You can pick up a ‘She Keeps Me Warm’ lyric poster!

Fancy!

Maybe Body Love is something that touched you! Well I want to touch you! That sounded better in my head! I meant I want you to feel soft in a comfy T-shirt. There are Body Love posters too!

And remember, the merch site is the only place you can order my collection of poetry, ‘500 tips for fat girls’. It’s kind of like ‘500 days of summer’ except it’s not. Not even close. I lied.

I WOULD NAME THESE KITTENS COLUMBUS AND LINCOLN.

Also, HAPPY FOURTH!!
EEEEE PATRIOTIC CATS!!!

xoxox

M

Hey beautiful babes,
My new single, SECRETS, is now being played on the radio!!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT! I’ve been pinching myself the last couple days. Totally surreal.

Secrets is a song about being unapologetically yourself! And it’s catchy! And I’m so so proud to have made something that has a message AND is fun. After thinking I could only write music to cry to, this is an amazing step in my journey to be the best songwriter I can be.

The song will be available for download on iTunes on August 5th. I know that is far away, but it’s okay! It’ll be so worth it! And maybe we can make it to the Top 40!!!

I really hope you like it. I made it for everyone to enjoy and hopefully relate. We’re all trying to figure it out, right? So let’s dance like idiots and snort when we laugh and tell people our secrets, because life is so much more fun when you realize no one actually knows what they’re doing.

Can’t wait for you to see the super fun video that goes along with it!

Evidence.

xoxo
M

It seems like every post these days is in all caps. But that’s because all the things that are happening are hella worthy of caps, my patriotic kittens. EVERYTHING IS THE COOLEST ALL THE TIME.

I am performing at the white house for her goddess, Michelle Obama and his infinite coolness, Barack, this week for a private ceremony for the Harvey Milk stamp issuance. Good news, I already know what dress I’m wearing. It’s hella patriotic.

Most people are unfortunately unable to be at that performance (unless you have a zillion dollars or are in the FBI or are Harry Styles or are an Animorph or something), BUT if you are in the D.C. area, I am performing a few songs for the Harvey Milk Foundation fundraiser event the night before.
THIS Wednesday, May 21st at Cobalt.

For those of you who don’t know, Harvey Milk was an inspiring leader for LGBT rights. He was one of the world’s first openly gay elected officials and was subsequently assassinated because of his sexual orientation. His story is beyond moving.
You can check out and support the foundation here.

This blog post could also be appropriately titled:
I Just Ate A Chicken Patty By Itself While I Was Crying at YouTube Comments and It May Have Been A Little Bit Frozen: Tales from Lonely Los Angeles

I was devastated the day I found out Truffula trees weren’t real. Life is hard.

I’m in L.A. again! I’m here working on my record with the best humans in the music industry. Best, meaning music-wise, and also people-y-wise.
I’ve had the pleasure to spend time with Eric Rosse, Benny Cassette, and Mozella while we’re working on my upcoming album. I love them. I love them and writing music with them has never been more fun or important.
I was so scared to co-write; for a long time I believed the only way I could write music was if I was on a manic binge without sleep, chain-smoking in the kitchen and crying into children’s books at 3am. Jokes on me! And on Dr. Seuss! You can be healthy and write music!
Good news, tortured artists of the world!

This album is making me think a lot about my motivations and what I want to put out into the world.
When I started the record I was like, cool, Mary. We have goals for this album! For my goals, I enter third person for absolutely no reason at all:

First things first- Buy all the stickers from all the craft stores so you can make cool christmas cards and send love letters with buttons on them that say, “you’re as cute as a button”. I recognize this is irrelevant. But it’s kind of relevant because you need to:

Once when I was 7, I told a fifth grader, “Check yourself before you wreck yourself, bone daddy.” You guys, I don’t even know where I came from.

1. Make money! Buy your mom a house! Start a charity! Tip brunch waitresses hundred dollar bills!
2. Stay true to yourself, boo-boo. That means don’t slack on your lyrics. Then you’re just being lazy.
3. Make sure you’re laughing! Music is fun!
4. Make something you want to hear on the radio so you can hear a DJ say, “Damn, that Mary Lambert, she’s even cooler than in third grade when she beat the older kids at tetherball.
5. Be 100% aware of your output on the world. Quasi-stardom is a tricky friend. It can make you think that your actions only matter when you want them to, that your lyrics don’t have gravity, or that your platform is a throwaway.

All actions, but especially actions made within the media and pop culture, have an inherent responsibility, no matter how seemingly miniscule.
The idea is that we are all in charge of our own output and our energy into the world.

High school was just like the OC. Except for the part where they were in high school and also the fact they were all adult actors

I just finished writing a song called ‘Chasing the Moon’ (as a poet, it is an unwritten rule to have at least one piece pay tribute to the moon) (I think) (I just made that up, but it sounds like a really cool life lesson to give new poets now), and the song is surrounding high school nostalgia. In my last year of high school, I was drinking and partying and had become an all around obnoxious delinquent. If I’m writing a song about my experience in high school, do I leave out the parts of the story that might offend other people? Am I unintentionally glorifying high school partying? Do I leave it out because I don’t want to condone underage drinking? But isn’t censorship, itself, offensive? Haven’t I fought tooth and nail to unflinchingly tell my story?

I came to terms with the new song we recorded. I have to believe that intention is as important as I think it is. I am attempting to catch a glimpse in time of my own life with this song. This song is my experience and I am relaying my story through art. It’s not a party song. It’s not a song about not drinking, either. It’s just a story.

Hella thanks to the Art Center College of Design for lending us hands, equipment, time, and love to make it happen!

The Body Love music video is also a story; it has multiple threads. I have so, so many thoughts on this piece of work and the reception it’s garnered the last week. I wrote Body Love when I was 19. At the time, I was self harming, felt worthless, and I was struggling to find any beauty in my reflection. All I could see was FAT GROSS UNLOVABLE written all over me. After I wrote the poem, I saw a ton of ways the video could go. To be completely honest, this is not the video I originally intended to make, and towards the end, I gave up my need for control and let go of trying to make it exactly what I wanted it to be, and let the amazing director and the crew do what they do best: Make this music video, with a vision and a specific artistic hand. Here, I’ve collected some of the thoughts I have had about the filming and some criticism I received as well.

1. The writing of this poem is my story. I can only write from my experience. I am a white, plus-size bi-polar lesbian that struggles with body issues and used to self harm. I don’t know what it’s like to be tall, or thin, to be a man, a person of color, or to be trans*. I do my best with acknowledging my privilege and the point of view I have. It’s the only one I’ve got.

2. I love this poem and it’s message. It’s one of my proudest moments as an artist. However, I don’t actually think this is my finest poetry. The subject changes too much, it’s metaphors are callous, and it doesn’t look great on the page, though it is a poem meant to be spoken. In the same way, I don’t think that ‘She Keeps Me Warm’ is my best song. I do know that Body Love is an important poem and SKMW is an important song and I get a ton of valuable feedback about their impact. Both LGBT* rights and self-worth are issues I care deeply about and affect me on a daily level. I can’t believe I get to sing every night about things that mean so much to me. But anyone who is a writer can understand the (hopeful) growth in craft and all the critiques that you give yourself retrospectively (“wish I would have said, can’t believe I rhymed ___ with ___, etc.).

In this metaphor, I’M THIS BABY. LOOK HOW CUTE THIS BABY IS. Also, on a creepy scale, how creepy is it that I’m just grabbing photos of people’s children from the internet and putting it on my queer ass blog?

3. I think it’s important to constantly challenge the marginalization of minorities. Whether it’s deliberate or not. It’s important to question privilege, motives, intention in the media, in pop culture, and in our daily lives. Dissection of art and pop culture is valued, but equally, so should celebration. It is an exciting time to be alive and to be an activist- the little victories deserve to be reveled in! When a baby is first walking, you don’t yell at her when she attempts and then falls; you cheer on her fearlessness, and encourage her to move forward with insight and advice. I welcome criticism to be a better artist and a better human. I’m hungry to grow! To spread positive light! To hug everyone all the time!

4. I use the metaphor of a mosque in the poem. The line is, “I know girls who are fleeing bombs from the mosques of their skin”. The intention of the metaphor is to paint our skin, our bodies as holy as a mosque, as a temple of worship. In 2006 and 2007, when I wrote this poem, there were a slew of mosques that had been bombed in the Middle East. I was emotionally shaken by these holy places completely demolished. At the same time thousands of miles away, friends of mine were shooting heroin, forcing themselves to throw up in the bathroom, and exhibiting severe destructive behavior. I use the parallel of war language in the poem throughout: “Our bodies deserve more than to be collateral”. In this specific metaphor, the bombs represent media pressures to be a certain kind of woman. As I see my poem now, I recognize that I am a woman that does not know the visceral impact that a bombing has. There might have been a better way to say what I intended, perhaps using the metaphor of a church, since my experience is that of a Christian. My sincerest apologies to anyone that was offended by this metaphor. I will try to be more conscious of my use of language and events in the future.

5. Jon Jon Augustavo directed this music video. He did an incredible job shooting intimate portraits of vulnerable human beings. This is a stunning piece and I’m so proud to call him a friend.

6. There were a ton of people involved in making this video happen. Their time, energy, and passion was so generous. The energy around the making of the video was electric. It was sacred and safe and involved a lot of crying for both the subjects and the crew.

7. We had an open casting call to any of my fans that wanted to take part in this project. The people who submitted photos and stories were a direct correlation to who we cast. This video is truly only successful because of the vulnerability of every single human that bared their soul and body. It was inspiring watching them from behind the camera. They were all so brave.

8. I wanted to include men (cis and trans), because everyone has body issues. Self harm and body image struggles are not exclusive to gender. Men also submitted to the casting call, which I was really impressed with, and it felt important to reflect that in the piece.

12. After we filmed, I became increasingly anxious. I realized afterward that we neglected to cast some demographics, and casted multiples of other demographics. Not on purpose, of course. We just had a certain amount of submissions of people who had incredible stories and backgrounds and chose to focus on them. In the video, there are no subjects with a physical disability, no trans women, no women over 50, no middle-aged men, no one who identifies as gender queer, and plenty of other demographics the video lacks. The omission of any demographic was not intentional. As a child who was always left out, I am obsessed with inclusivity. The lack of certain demographics weighed heavily on my mind post shoot, and I’ve had anxiety about the lack of certain bodies since then. I had to come to a place of peace. I didn’t want the casting call to be me yelling “we need one asian! we need an anorexic!” I see casting calls and I know that’s how hollywood does it, but I wanted this video to be different. To be inclusive organically. I wanted to hear people’s stories, not base casting solely on their demographic.

13. All of that being said, I really wish we would have searched harder to cast a trans woman in the video. That is my biggest regret of this experience. Especially with the poem being directed towards all women, written by me, a cis woman, it would have been such an incredible statement to have a trans woman play an active role. As someone that dated a two-spirit soul, gender identity is something I think about a lot.

You are great teachers, babes, but Mrs. Krabappel stole my heart a long time ago.

I don’t intend this information to be likened to the sentiment of “I can’t be racist! I have a black friend!”– what I mean to convey here, is that trans* issues are really important to me and being in a relationship with someone that was constantly discriminated against for their gender identity affected me and changed my 19 year old doe-eyed view of the world. My heart hurts for any trans women that felt deliberately excluded. It was so far from my intention. I had a good cry about it today, and the only thing I could think to do is to offer an apology to the trans* community. I still have a lot to learn, and I am grateful for all of the teachers in my life, including my beautiful audience. I want to honor all of you. With my art, my media, my stories, and my existence- both publicly and privately.

I can’t wait to make another music video! I really can’t. There are so many things I want to accomplish and I’m learning the most effective, kindest way to do them all. I appreciate all of your love and positive light and kind criticism and even the militant criticism of the video. I am also going to try super hard to not read YouTube comments anymore. Cyber bullying is alive and well, y’all. I have so much to learn, and am really excited to have complete world domination. Did that sneak in there? Oh. Yes. Did I mention my world domination is rampant with kittens and little girls in sailor hats singing christmas carols and gluten-free baguettes? But also, inclusivity and safe spaces and locally grown food and free higher education and funding for the arts and a lot of glitter?

My posse is coming for you. And they are cute as fuck.

Welcome to the age of  SPACE KITTENS Y’ALL.

 xoxoxox

forever and ever,

M

Dear citizens of the universe (and beyond) (like bed bath and beyond) (but actually not at all like bed bath and beyond),

I’m releasing the Body Love music video in one week.

I decided to launch The Body Love campaign in conjunction with the anticipation of the video starting today. Every day on my Instagram, I will focus on a part of my body that I embrace, and offer you to do the same- posting a picture with it, hashtags, and a description that will automatically post to the Body Love Campaign website. Your empowerment and strength can be a tool for others. I believe we can build each other up.  I think self love is one of the most important and potentially culture-shifting movements that is happening and can be propelled. I was inspired by Denise Jolly’s “Be Beautiful” project, and Sonya Renee’s  “The Body is Not an Apology” movement.

How beautiful is that phrase? The body is not an apology. It almost makes me cry. Being a lesbian, a plus size woman, and an incest and rape survivor born in poverty, I have spent much of my life in guilt. All of these identities that are a part of me have effected my body in one way or another, most for the worse– especially in my teens. I binge ate, cut myself, slept with whoever validated me, and drank to oblivion. I made a vow at 21, when I wrote the final edit of the poem, “Body Love”  that my self-destructive behavior would end with the birth of this writing. This is a live video of the poem, and probably the most vulnerable I’ve felt performing.

I also want to take a brief minute to say that I write these things from the point of view of a plus-size woman, which is my experience. I can’t tell you what it’s like to be too tall to find clothes at department stores, or too petite to fit into regular women’s clothing, or be criticized for not being a buff enough man. But I do know what it’s like to feel simultaneously invisible and also the subject of brutally mean comments. All body dysmorphia is valid; Everyone is going through something. I try to remember that as much as I can. The girl at Starbucks who doesn’t look up to even make eye contact or bother to say ‘hello’ back to me is going through something. Regardless of my indignation, I am not entitled to any kind of response. I am in charge of my own energy output into the world. I realize now we are all simultaneously victims and villains with our judgments.

Sometimes I wake up and I’m like,

“Hell yeah. what a great bod. I’m gonna dance all naked in front of the mirror for way too long.” and then sometimes I look at myself and I only see what the mean girls in middle school told me. In my head I hear:

“You’re too fat to be loved.”

Despite the guise of curvy confidence, with an EP titled ‘Welcome to the Age of My Body’ to shout it from the rooftops and borderline preachy posts on social media, I think about it daily. A couple months ago, my girlfriend kissed my stomach for the simple reason that she truly loved it, loved every part of me, and I found myself sobbing uncontrollably. For completely baring my soul on stages around the country, I was terrifyingly shaken by this sheer act of pure love. How could someone possibly love this stomach? These stretch marks? Our stomachs are made to tuck, to hide, to put spanx on, to smooth out, right?

The thought occurred to me:

I am not an isolated incident. This is not the first time a human has had any of these thoughts. In fact, this is a universal fear, regardless of size.

“I am too ______ to be loved.”

To this, I say:

You are not, nor have you ever, been alone.

Your body is worthy.

Of love, of dignity, of sexiness, of glory.

We are all stumbling to find ourselves.

We are all aching to love each other in the mess.

You are capable of exercising self-love.

You have all the knowledge and power to heal your own wounds, and no one can do that for you.

Starting today and through the week, I will focus on a body part every day, and tell you why I like it and why it’s hella real. I want you to share why YOU like YOUR hair, booty, face, etc. on social media with me. Let’s make this big.

Today on Tuesday the 15th, I begin my #BodyLove campaign with LoveMyHair. I love my reddish/brownish hair that sometimes I dye and sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I don’t have time to wash it and it gets hella dirty and gross and the hair stylist looks at me like I’m trying to get white girl dreads. I put it in a bun on my head! I wear a headband and look like a soccer mom! I side-pony it! I let it curl naturally! I put bandanas in it, who cares? I love it. #LoveMyHair. #BodyLove

Love you babes.

xoxoxo

M

Share with me why you love YOUR hair today (tomorrow is a new Body Love) and please feel free to rhyme.  Upload an image of yourself to Instagram (and boos, include both hashtags and @marylambertsing so I can see it!) #BodyLove #LoveMyHair

Oh my babes. Woah babes. OH MY BABES I AM HEADING ON TOUR WITH GAVIN DEGRAW AND MATT NATHANSON.
I know the dates are selective, boo boos, but don’t worry your pretty little heads; I got some pride festivals and random other shows to gay up this Summer, and there are even some dates that haven’t been announced yet.

At first I was like, yo agent, how do I fit in with these dudes? I super respect them, but how is this gonna work?! Are they even into crying?! Rabble rabble I asked for Tori Amos rabble rabble. And then I saw THIS. Hella props to Matt Nathanson for that video. And then I thought about how cool Gavin Degraw’s hats are and how his live show must be killer because, really, that voice omg, and how my best friend and I used to blast Chariot in the car when we skipped school went to bible study and made charm bracelets. And then I was like, WHY DON’T I ADD A FULL BAND and hire all my friends to go on tour with me?! And so it was, pretty kittens. I’m gonna have a bus and put a candle in it and put pictures of baby animals and Beyonce everywhere and make an altar for Tegan and Sara.

AND I’M GONNA SEE YOU OUT THERE THIS SUMMAH.

6/15 – San Diego, CA @ Humphrey’s (on sale 4/5)

6/18 – Los Angeles, CA @ Greek Theatre (on sale 4/5)

6/20 – Berkeley, CA @ Greek Theatre (on sale 3/28)

6/22 – San Luis Obispo, CA @ Avila Beach Concerts at the Cove (on sale 3/21)

6/29 – Salt Lake City, UT @ Red Butte Garden Amphitheater (on sale 5/5)

6/30 – Colorado Springs, CO @ Pikes Peak Amphitheater (on sale 3/21)

7/1 – Boulder, CO @ Boulder Theater (on sale 3/21)

7/3 – Kearney, NE @ Viearo Events Center (on sale 3/28)

7/5 – Council Bluffs, IA @ Harrah’s Council Bluffs Hotel & Casino (on sale 4/4)

7/6 – St. Paul, MN @ The Myth (on sale 3/21)

7/9 – Kansas City, MO @ The Crossroads (on sale 3/21)

7/10 – Cedar Rapids, IA @ McGrath Amphitheater (on sale 3/21)

7/11 – Fargo, ND @ The Venue (on sale 3/21)

7/16 – Toronto, ON @ Sound Academy (on sale 3/21)

7/17 – Toledo, OH @ Toledo Zoo Amphitheater (on sale 3/21)

Hey all my babes!

I’m at it again. Making sad songs and singing them and recording them and sharing them and crossing
my fingers and toes and eyes that you’ll like them. Just kidding about my eyes. I have sensitive sockets.

This is a video of me singing ‘Sarasvati’ off the “Welcome to the Age of My Body” EP that I released a couple weeks ago. I wrote this song when I was 19, and it was close to the time I attempted suicide. I was in a very dark place.
For a long time, I think I had an obsession with the glory of my own death. I wrote this as sort of a love song to death that also contains the sentiment of being sickly co-dependent within a relationship– in a way that you would allow yourself to totally self-destruct for another person. I don’t recommend listening to this for light background music with your mee-maw, but maybe if your grandmother is hard of hearing and likes a lot of chord changes, then go nuts for cowboy butts and take it to grams and gramps house for an after-pie listening party! Truthfully, my hope is that rather than seeing this as a sad song, you might see it as an exploration of vulnerability.

I will now be known as ‘Scruffles’. Thank you.

I was hesitant to put this song on the EP simply because it is so dark, and I never want to “bum anyone out”. I’M A BLAST! I’m like a kitten playing with yarn in a basket you guys!

But part of being a vulnerable artist/babely babe means that I believe in equally sharing both my joys and my darkness with you.
It’s important to me that my audience understands that my story involves sadness. I think it’s okay to be honest with ourselves and say “Yes. I have thought about suicide. I have been in a dark place.” You’re not crazy for it, you know? None of us are. The really neat thing I learned through all of this is that my capacity for joy and love has exponentially grown since I wrote this song, and I think partially it’s because of the openness itself. It should also be said, IT’S SUPER AWESOME IF YOU’VE NEVER HAD SUICIDAL THOUGHTS. I think that’s incredible, and I give you metaphysical hugs and release red balloons in your honor! And I also kiss a baby’s forehead!

Buddy the Elf is my spirit animal.

I’ve got so many neat things coming up that I’m busting at the seams to tell you about (EXAMPLE: WORKING ON MY FIRST FULL-LENGTH ALBUM MAYBE), but I’ve been studying the element of surprise from winding up jack-in-the-boxes, and judging by my heart rate, I’m almost positive you’ll love what’s coming especially without anymore hints.

I love all of you. So much. You who are hurting or healing or celebrating or having great sex or making a pizza or trying to remember to love yourself or feeling alone or maybe feeling nothing at all: YOU ARE SO LOVED OVER HERE. I’m high-fiving all of you for having such a divine human experience, whether it feels shitty right now or not. I implore you to be present in your grief and be just as present in your joy.

xoxoxo
M

OK babes. Let’s be real. I’ve been real stinkin’ busy and haven’t had a heart to heart with you. So let’s catch the fuck up. Some bullet points of my last couple months:

* I signed to CAPITOL RECORDS in October and I get to do pretty much whatever I want, which is amazing because I want to do a lot of cool things that save humanity.

* The NEW YORK TIMES did a piece on me and it was front page of the Arts section and I may have carried it around with me for a month showing flight attendants, cab drivers, annoyed baristas, and other unsuspecting employees preoccupied with working.
ugh the nerve.

* My new EP comes out NEXT WEEK, on TUESDAY 12/17. It’s got some old tracks that are re-vamped and ready for radio and world domination, and a new track that will gut your insides and you’ll need blankets and a kitten and frozen yogurt probably and I apologize in advance. The four track album is called “Welcome to the Age of My Body” which is great introduction to how cute of a butt I have. I have a cute butt.

You guys, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you with how amazing my rack is.

* “Welcome to the Age of My Body” is a line from a Brian Ellis poem that I fell in love with because a dear friend read me his book on a drive from Portland. It’s always stuck with me. It is brilliant and simple and beautiful and you should purchase his book as well as other talented writers I adore.

* I have great blood pressure. I used the air-puffer-tester when I was at CVS. This feels relevant somehow.

* I have been on the Macklemore and Ryan Lewis’ arena tour since October singing ‘Same Love’ and crying often about the beauty of life. I have been on a tour bus with 11 incredibly talented angel-humans for almost two months and it has been a life-altering experience. To say that I’m honored is an understatement. I spent my childhood performing sad songs to thousands of invisible people that loved me. I was so lonely then. I don’t know how I got to this point or if it’s divinity or what, but I am doing my best to honor every moment and the incredible impact our song has had.

* ‘Same Love’ is nominated for Song of the Year at The Grammys. I don’t even. I can’t. I’m just. Heaven on earth. I just cry and cry and cry out of sheer disbelief, happiness, and gratitude. The nomination is not about Ben, Ry, or me as songwriters, but about the reflection of our society that makes a song like this soar. It says that we have come leaps and bounds regarding equality and that NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT A LESBIAN BASED “SHE” PRONOUN IN A SONG. That’s an incredibly beautiful thing to witness and be at the epicenter for. I’m ecstatic. Humbled. Completely shaken in the best way possible.

I LOVE THEM I JUST LOVE THEM SO MUCH

* Fun fact: Two years ago, I ran a Kickstarter for my first EP, “Letters Don’t Talk” before we recorded “Same Love”. I made an offer to anyone donating $1000 that they would be my +1 to the Grammys. See below.

This is an example of magic. I google imaged it.

* It’s Christmastime and that means all wonderful things happen. Like magic. I hope you are having magic this December.

* I moved into a new apartment by myself. It has big windows and a real washer and dryer and a place for my bicycle and I am feeling many things. Loneliness, peace, discovery of self, joy, mourning of my relationship, and welcoming the struggle to find independence. I am definitely a different person than I was prior to ‘Same Love’ and those feelings definitely reflect that. I don’t think it’s necessarily a better or worse change, just different. I’m learning things about myself that I never knew existed. The change is simultaneously welcomed and terrifying.

* I am extremely late, but I discovered jeggings.

* The new radio edit of She Keeps Me Warm debuted on Seattle radio yesterday on KISS 106.1 and will be on many stations starting next week!! There’s a cool video of me freaking out online.

* I did a cool cover of ‘Teenage Dirtbag’ for Billboard.com and I’m proud of it, plus my shoes are peacock painted from Hourglass Footwear and they are the bomb.

* I HAVE A LOT OF SHOWS COMING. I will let you know, babes.

I hope you are all having the best December ever, and you love each other and are kind to your babies and the cashier and your neighbors and your spouses and most importantly, yourself. You can’t take care of others if you can’t take care of yourself.
Some things I’ve been doing to take care of myself that you can try if you want:

All hail, Robyn. Amen.

Dancing to Robyn’s Body Talk in my panties
Putting salsa in my salads instead of dressing- GENIUS
Making my bed
Ordering CRAZY AMAZING PLUS SIZE CLOTHING FROM CITY CHIC
Reading Andea Gibson‘s poetry
Having a crush and writing cute songs and poems and feeling tingly
Wearing flannel
Eating dried mango slices
Praying
Introducing myself to strangers and smiling at everyone
Talking to my beautiful family
Letting myself cry before bed if I need to
Stretching
Drinking champagne and celebrating nothing and everything
Loving and loving and loving and loving

This is if you were a kitten and I was a kitten. I think life would just be better (albeit less productive) if we were all kittens.

That said, all of my love to you and one massive hug and kiss on the nose from me to you.
You are all wonderbeings with skin on.

xoxo
M

OMIGOD OMIGOD Only two days until we release the music video for ‘She Keeps Me Warm’. I can’t believe it. I’m so proud of my video baby. It’s totally like my baby. And I’m inducing labor on Friday.

In case you missed some of the behind-the-scenes photos, here are some!

That’s a real director snappy thing!

You really can’t help but fall in love with Bryn. Sigh.

I have a serious phone addiction. To be fair, I think I’m showing Bryn the importance of Twitter. Civil service, everyone!

Who doesn’t love to make out with a camera in your face and everyone staring? #exhibitionists

Not to mention, I have some PNW shows-

SEATTLE! Wednesday August 28th. It’s for real for real ten dollars. Buy those cheap ass tickets here.

Also on the horizon, OPENING FOR TEGAN AND SARA on August 30th at the Britt Pavilion. 17 year old Mary has had 4 heart attacks and stayed up all night writing string quartets to impress those babes. There’s a reason their album is called ‘Heartthrob’.

Buy those tickets HERE.

Also, obviously,

I’M SINGING AT THE VMA’s!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Holy smokes. My life is outta control.

I’m going to go do cartwheels badly and fist pump around Seattle. So look for that.

LOVE YOU GUYS

xoxo

M

As if today couldn’t be more exciting with the announcement that I’ll be SINGING SAME LOVE AT THE VMAS with Macklemore and Ryan Lewis (not included in the announcement: lots of sequins and spanx) (also not included in the announcement: trying to hold Beyonce’s hand),

I’M OPENING FOR TEGAN AND SARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’M NOT LYING LIKE IN 5TH GRADE WHEN I SAID I VACATIONED IN PARIS, IT’S ON THEIR WEBSITE FOR REAL

IS THIS REAL LIFE????
I’ve been peeing my pants all day. I hella need new pants.
Our show is in Jacksonville, Oregon on August 30th- GET THERE!!
http://www.brittfest.org/performances/teganandsara2013

TEGAN AND SARA AND MARY= <3<3<3<3 4 EVR

xox

M

“She Keeps Me Warm” is now available on iTunes. Click to buy!!

Come say hello and hug me and hug my heart.

AUGUST 3rd  / Secret Location / 7pm                    
Appearing with Daniel Blue for
ONE DEBUT FEATURE SONG,
along with Courtney Marie Andrews,
Jason Scott Dodson, and Micah Simler

For tickets and location email:
tickets@ballardsanctuary.com

AUGUST 28th   /  NEUMOS   /   8pm
Mary Lambert with The Passenger String Quartet
featuring Wishbeard
and Daniel Blue from Motopony

BUY TICKETS HERE

LOS ANGELES, CA
September 27th / HOTEL CAFE / 8pm

BUY TICKETS HERE

It’s here!!!!!!!!! WE DID IT!!!!!!!!!

Here’s a little forward about ‘She Keeps Me Warm’.

           Ben, Ryan, and Hollis approached me to write the chorus to ‘Same Love’ at the time I needed it most. For years, and especially at 23, I had been processing my seemingly contradictory life: The Christian and The Queer, all the while battling a history of sexual abuse and manic-depression. I wrote about being a gay christian often in my poetry, but never expressed it in music without it feeling contrived.

           The second the song played through my computer speakers, I knew this was why I had never been able to kill myself through the years of my mental illness. I knew this is why I was still alive: This was the song that was so important, my God. I wanted to write a chorus that was poignant and honest; genuine. I really tried to not be gay at points in my life, but I was (and am) at a point where I refuse to apologize about my identity. I am not sorry about my gayness. I am not sorry I’m a Christian, either, though that’s far less persecuted than my gayness, which is ironically, instigated by the Christian community. “Not crying on Sundays” was a huge lyric for me to write. I cried and cried in church for a year, believing that I was going to Hell, trying to reconcile “the demons”. At some point, it became absurd.
I will not apologize for love. And my God, the God that I believe to be true, would never condemn love like this.

              ‘Same Love’ had to be written from a place of love, I believed. I think that the best way to impact the world positively is to come from a place pure of heart, with complete and total love for humanity. I love. I love so much it makes me cry for no reason. I love humanity even when it is sickening and fails miserably at taking care of each other. When humanity seems devoid of love, it’s because it hasn’t been nurtured enough. I believe in nurturing it. 

                Releasing ‘She Keeps Me Warm’ today is a massive and scary step. Simply because this song is not political. It’s not about oppression or marriage equality. This song is a love song. That’s all it is. It’s an honest love song, an extended version of my chorus from ‘Same Love’. It’s another side of the story. The only difference with this song is that there are female pronouns. I’m not trying to be shocking. I suppose it’s inadvertently making a statement, but I hope this song sits in all hearts- gay or straight. It’s not about any of that. It’s about love. It’s always been about love. 

Here are all the beautiful people that made this happen:

Written from the chorus of Macklemore and Ryan Lewis’ song, ‘Same Love’ featuring Mary Lambert. Available for download exclusively on Bandcamp from 7/22/2013 to 7/29/2013. Available on iTunes 7/30/2013. Written by Mary Lambert 

Strings composed by Andrew Joslyn, performed by The Passenger String Quartet
Tim Mendonsa- Guitar, Bass
Tommy Whiteside- Drums
Maiah Manser- Back-up Vocals
Jonathan Plum- Guitar, Aux Percussion
Andrew Joslyn- Violin
Sarah Chung- Violin II
Seth May-Patterson- Viola
Rebecca Chung Filice- Cello
Mary Lambert- Piano, Vocals

Produced by Jonathan Plum
Mixes by Jonathan Plum and Geoff Ott
Recorded at London Bridge Studios in Seattle, Washington.
Mastered by Glenn Schick
Cover Photos by Mego Lin
Cover Design by Jesse Codling
Cover Models are Mary Lambert and Bryn Santillan

ENJOY THE TRACK!!!!!!

For real. For real, for real. You can purchase it on the music tab of my site, or at www.marylambert.bandcamp.com on Monday morning at 8am.

Washington state, you can listen live to NPR/KUOW 94.9 at 9:30am to hear the radio debut and an interview and probably me crying about how excited I am about this release. If you live anywhere else you can stream it live on their website!!

The track will be available on iTunes Tuesday, July 30th.
You can hear a second interview and a DJ set from me on Sunday night, July 28th at 11pm on 107.7 The End in Seattle, or listen live wherever your heart is living.

I have put everything into this song, and had an amazing team of people make this happen. I couldn’t have done it alone, so I want to credit some beautiful people before it goes live and you fall in love with the track and you play it at your wedding.

Dillon Larkin is my manager
Jonathan Plum produced the track
 Geoff Ott and Jonathan mixed the track
Recorded at London Bridge Studios
Andrew Joslyn composed all the strings
Glenn Schick mastered the track
Mego Lin provided stills from the not-yet-released music video
Jesse Codling designed the cover art
Bryn Santillan, from the band Wishbeard is the cute girl on the cover

BUY IT ON MONDAY WHILE I LISTEN TO THAT SONG FROM MATILDA WHEN SHE FIGURES OUT HER POWERS AND THE POKER CHIPS ARE FLYING EVERYWHERE

Represent. Gay style.

And it was the most incredible thing I’ve ever done. A vision that I’ve had for over a year not only came to fruition, but was executed more beautifully than I ever could have imagined. This last weekend was so humbling.

Oh me? Just reading and checking out a girl’s bum.

A year ago, I was feeling sappy and sweet thinking about how in love I was with my boo. I had just watched a cute lesbian movie on Netflix, and thought I would make a search for the cutest lesbian music videos on YouTube. It hadn’t occurred to me that I had never seen one. There’s a reason I never saw one.

I know. I KNOW. I know.

It doesn’t exist. THERE ISN’T EVEN ONE DAMN MUSIC VIDEO WITH TWO CUTE GIRLS IN LOVE. Sure, little clips of women holding hands or kissing in conjunction with other couples, and of course there are videos with two lipstick femmes going at it in lingerie. It’s been my vision to change that for the last year, and why not do it with ‘She Keeps Me Warm’. As a gay singer-songwriter, I have often struggled with pronouns in my writing. My thoughts were always, “I can’t say ‘She’s the bomb dot com,’ I have to say ‘You’re the bomb dot com.'” After singing ‘Same Love’ all over the country and hearing teenage girls not giving two shits about what the pronoun of the chorus was, it’s given me strength to believe that the world can handle ‘She Keeps Me Warm’.

Bryn Santillan, my video girlfriend, and Zoe Rain our AC/gaffer. Also hot babes. Though not in their job titles.

The song is purely about love. And I think that resonates with everyone. Love is universal.

SORRY EVERYONE WE’RE MAKING HISTORY ON THE ROOFTOP. SUCK IT.

We had a total of 60 extras that came out to help, and made the shoot so much more real. I didn’t even know that I knew that many people. We had to start cutting people off the extras list because we had too many people! THAT’S NUTSO BOO. Our director was Mego Lin, the Cinematographer for ‘Same Love’ and ‘Can’t Hold Us’.

Mego Lin screaming, “THAT’S A WRAP” at 2am.

Mego was unbelievable. This was her first major solo project, and she is one of the most rewarding people to work with, and it’s an honor to call her a friend. Zoe Rain, made her music video debut as an AC/gaffer for Mego. She’s also cute as a button and is featured in a little snippet at the end of ‘Same Love’ with her lady, Allison.

This is me blushing because you blush when you have a crush on a cute girl.

Our producer, Jennifer O’Brien made everything run so smoothly and pulled magic out of her ass. Her main job was just making sure I didn’t get drunk on set at the bar scene. Bryn Santillan played the part of my girlfriend and was the best video girlfriend anyone could ever ask for, and the femmes of the world will swoon for days. She is also the lead singer in a damn good band, Wishbeard. Listen to them, dumb-dumb. Special shout out to my real girlfriend for feeding 60 cast and crew and being totally okay with me having an on-screen romance! Dream girl.

Another thing I loved about making this video is that it was an all queer female crew. It felt empowering and safe. I  have no doubt in my mind that this video is going to be a very important one. You’re going to cry when this video comes out, I’m telling you. A non-political, non-sexualized, lesbian love story. Because it’s about fucking time.

I think Bryn and I just killed the cute game.

P.S.   IS THIS MY LIFE?? I GET TO CHANGE THE WORLD ALL THE TIME?? OKAY. I’M ON IT, UNIVERSE.

And I’m gonna, Seattle!! July 11th at The Sorrento Hotel. 

And it’s free. And it’s sexy. And I’m gonna wear a black dress and curl my hair and pretend to be Audrey Hepburn in “My Fair Lady” or just Audrey Hepburn in general.

Just me, a piano, and a fireplace, but maybe not the fireplace because it could be really hot that day, so maybe I’ll serenade you by the bomb AC. 

Also I’m gonna be at the Mainstage at PrideFest in the Seattle Center on June 30th being hella gay with other gays and allies and beautiful people. 

See you there, cuties!!

PS: CD’s are no longer sold out! You can buy them here if you wanna.

<3 <3 <3

Hey my beautiful babes,

I’ve been glued to twitter for the last 12 hours. This Boston stuff is crazy scary. My thoughts and prayers are with you Watertown, MIT, Boston. <3 <3 <3

I just want to write poems and songs for the whole world and stop anger and hatred.

In other news, the fire alarm in my building went off the other night, and the fire department came and everyone was in their pajamas and a little frightened. But it turned out it was burnt popcorn. I know, riveting story, Mary.

I need a real camera. Or a photographer.

For the real reason of this post: I GOT NEW T-SHIRTS! WHAM! BAM!
Black v-necks that make your boobs look great, and are comfy and good for hugging. Not good for cat hair. Crew shirts for the dudes that want to wear an umbrella with a heart inside of it. C’mon, add it to your wardrobe and then your girlfriend can steal it and cry in it. BUY THEM HERE.

And, of course, there are new shows announced for Vancouver (WITH LEMOLO), Seattle, Portland, New York City, and Bellingham on the shows tab. You better be there or I’m going to hold a grudge against you like I did with my 3rd grade teacher for telling me my stuffed animal, “Bear-nard” was not an acceptable show-and-tell item.

xoxox
M

Also New Zealand PASSED MARRIAGE EQUALITY!! Yay New Zealand. I gotta plan my trip.

$12 bucks boo.
May 21st.

Also, NYC and Bellingham, I’m coming to you.

<3 <3 <3 <3

xoxo

M

Vancouver, B.C. COME CRY WITH ME
ELECTRIC OWL
April 28th, $8 pre-sale/$12 dos
19+
WITH LEMOLO
EVENT PAGE
PRE-SALE TICKETS

PORTLAND, OREGON COME CRY WITH ME
BACKSPACE
May 7th, 9pm, $7
ALL AGES, bar w/ID
with Bike Thief
EVENT PAGE
PRE-SALE TICKETS

Seattle, WA
TOWN HALL
April 9th, 7pm
Hedgebrook Rising with Carolyn Forche, Karen Finney-Frock

Bellingham, WA
VILLAGE BOOKS
April 26th
with Rose McAleese

Seattle, WA
MEANDERS KITCHEN
April 27th
Benefit for Camp Ten Trees & Queer Rock Camp

Vancouver, B.C.
ELECTRIC OWL
April 28th

Portland, OR
BACKSPACE
May 7th, 9pm
with Bike Thief
PRE-SALE TICKETS

Seattle, WA
FREMONT ABBEY
May 14th, 8pm
The Round, with Daniel Blue (Motopony), River Giant, Karen Finney-Frock

Bellingham, WA
WWU, UNDERGROUND COFFEEHO– USE
May 15th, 9pm, FREE
with Whitney Ballen and The Intimates

New York City, NY
SUB CULTURE
May 21st, doors @6:30pm, $15 presale/$18 doors
PRE-SALE TICKETS

Seattle, WA
THE CROCODILE
May 23rd, doors @7:00pm, $10 presale/$15 doors
with The Cellar Door
PRE-SALE TICKETS

George, WA
SASQUATCH FESTIVAL
May 24th
performing ‘Same Love’ with Macklemore

Des Moines, WA
HIGHLINE COMMUNITY COLLEGE
October 31st, 12:00pm

Hey my babes,

Put that pink and red equality sign on your shit. The bacon one is cool too. Tell your friends why it’s important. Tell the fundamentalists to suck it, because they haven’t read the bible. Pray. Pray. Hug people. Pray some more. Sign petitions. Be an ally. If you’re gay, come out. Something like 20 percent of Americans claim that they don’t know a gay person. The more vocal our community is, the stronger we are.

<3 <3

On an unrelated topic, new shows are going to be announced this weekend! I went to SXSW and it was the most stressful week of my entire life. I think I forgot to shower for 4 days. Don’t worry, I didn’t get white people dreads. I’m grateful for the opportunities I have, totally. But my SXSW showcase was probably the worst performance I’ve ever had. I’m telling you this because I trust you, my babes. Thankfully, I redeemed myself at a beautiful charity event for Arts Corps, a non-profit for arts education. They help the poetry organization that saved my life when I was 18, Seattle Youth Speaks. I gave a speech! A real one! I only almost cried 4 times. There were hella generous people there and they gave Arts Corps something like 180,000 dollars. That’s bananas in pajamas.

Can’t wait to see you: Portland, Vancouver, Bellingham, and New York!! Venues, dates, and line-ups will be announced soonsies. As always, I appreciate every ounce of your support. Thanks guys, you’re the best.

Here’s a picture of me in the 3rd grade.

I wish I still had that dress. And those bangs!

xoxox

M

Wowie Zowie, my babes. Where do I start??

I am only slightly embarrassed to say that I cried while eating a cupcake. To be fair, there was a Hallmark commercial on TV at the same time.

The Northeastern/Canadian Good Feelings Tour was AMAZING. Washington D.C. gave us so much love. We ate Sprinkles Cupcakes, went to the zoo, and had amazing food. A woman drove her kids an hour to see our show. On a school night!
Thanks, cool mom in D.C.

Rochester proved to be one of the most rewarding shows we’ve done. The amazing Poetry & Pie Night held by the insanely talented and generous Rachel McKibbens (who is one of MY favorite writers on planet earth in the universe, forever, amen) was otherworldly. We cried with you. Hard.
Ottawa and Montreal were a total blast. Montreal is hella French, and I was able to embarrass myself and Rose with my sloppy high school French at every opportunity available. Totally worth it.
We finished the tour off in Burlington, Vermont where I was blown away. We hadn’t done a ton of promotion in Vermont, and couldn’t believe that the entire place was packed.
Actually, we’re proud to say that every Northeastern venue WAS AT CAPACITY.
WHAT IN THE WHAT.

After being home for 9 hours, I promptly left Seattle for a songwriting retreat at Hedgebrook, on Whidbey Island. I am so humbled to be sharing meals, friendships, and talks by the fire with Victoria Legrand of Beach House, TheeSatisfaction,

Dear TheeSatisfaction, shut up with how cool you guys are.

Angel Olsen, and Choklate. I have a little cottage in the woods with my piano, french press coffee, birds, fresh air, hiking trails, and a clawfoot bathtub for A WEEK. It’s kind of like the hippie female illuminati, except there’s nothing evil and we don’t have a zillion dollars. I keep pretending I’m Laura Ingalls Wilder, mostly because I get to make a badass fire every morning. I’m so good at making fires you guys! I’m kicking fire’s ass right now! I will be sad to leave, but I am excited for…

SOUTH BY SOUTHWEST!!! YAY!!!! It’s been a dream of mine to play this iconic festival since I was a wee babe. I have a whole roster of shows for this Spring and Summer and they should be released within the coming weeks.

MUSIC VIDEO!!!! The video for “Forget Me” debuts in the next week!! It’s hella sad, and I am sad in it, but mostly because I didn’t sleep for 72 hours while we were filming. It will be released soon, and when it does, you have to post that shit all over everything, ok? Send it to your third grade teacher, even. She’ll be all, “Oh, Carlton, this video is hella sad, but thank you because Mary Lambert is pretty and now I’m going to give her my pet monkey and my life savings.” Then I can make more sad videos and have a monkey. Also, Carlton? You should change your name.

Stay beautiful, my babes.
xoxo
M

Crazy. Crazy. Crazy.

Seattle, Boston, New York, Toronto: all shows were AT CAPACITY. FOR FUCKING REAL.
What in the hell. I had to order more books for the other shows. I can’t thank you guys enough for coming to the shows, supporting me and the beautiful Rose McAleese, buying our merch, but most of all, sharing your stories with me.

We got our nails done. Well, I got my toesies. Rose discovered shellac, which has changed her life.

I don’t know how many times I’ve cried at these shows. I am overwhelmed; my heart is so big for you guys. To hear that women have reached out for treatment for their sexual abuse, for their eating disorders, to hear that both men and women have begun loving their bodies, have come out to their families– it’s like one massive cry in my hotel room, y’all.

Me, improved with swag and A CHAIN.

New York was so lovely. After my mixed experiences on the Macklemore tour concerning New York City, I was apprehensive, but holy hell. Rose and I had an amazing time.

I discovered TopShop, which (of course) didn’t carry pants big enough to embrace all of my awesome booty (their loss), but they had some bangin’ shoes and jewelry. Which brings me to my next topic: I GOT A CHAIN, courtesy of Rose. Which also begs me to say to my curvy sisters- motherfucking TORRID. I have been shopping there for 4 years, and it has changed my life. I almost don’t shop anywhere else, besides thrift store finds, of course. Just wanted to throw that out there.

One of our routes! It’s a bow-tie!

Rose McAleese and I are currently somewhat snowed-in in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. We were almost snowed-in at the border from Toronto, but escaped it early this morning. We’re on our way to Washington D.C., where we have hella shows. 3 to be exact. So if you live in D.C., you gotta come, ok?

The one good thing about being in Harrisburg, PA, is that it’s right next to Hershey, PA, WHERE THE HERSHEY FACTORY IS LOCATED OMG. Needless to say, we’re taking a little detour tomorrow. I’ll be calling my dentist in advance.

As seen in Pennsylvania. WHERE DO I SIGN UP??

Last thing:
My book is now available online!!!
 Whaaaaaaaa?! I’m working on the kindle thing. That’ll be later, okay, my boos?

These are our last shows on the tour:

Shirlington, VA-
Monday February 4, 8- 10 pm
Busboys and Poets Shirlington
251 Campbell Avenue Arlington, VA 22206
Free

Washington, DC
2/5/2013, 9- 11 pm
Busboys and Poets 14th & V
2021 14th St NW, Washington, DC 20009
Free  

Busboys and Poets 5th & K
2/6/2013  9- 11 pm
1025 15th St NW, Washington, DC 20001
Free

Rochester, NY
2/9/2013
House Show!
(Contact poetryandpienight@gmail.com for address and details)

Ottawa, ON
2/12/2013
The Rainbow Bistro
9:30/ $5

Montreal, QC
2/14/2013
Le Cagibi
8:30/ $5

Burlington, VT
2/16/2013
Radio Bean
7:00/ FREE

xoxo,
M

Ok. Let me preface all of everything ever:
‘500 tips for fat girls’ is not an advice book. It is a collection of poetry surrounding body image, rape, and relationships. There are no actual tips. The title poem, is a jabbing list poem that comments on misogyny, self-hatred, and media pressures. This is an inner dialogue of tragic thoughts that I’ve had and curvy women often have.

MY BOOK AHHHHHHHH

“always turn the light off before fucking
always lie on your stomach, always be on a diet,
always be generous, always smile,
don’t be a bitch- don’t be a fat bitch”

I can’t speak for all big girls, and I don’t want to try. To me, most curvy women end up having to navigate themselves through a frustrating process to find self-love. I think that navigation to self-love is universal. This book is a collection of poetry exploring that.
Let me be totally real with you here: this book is so goddamn honest that it terrifies me in a really great way. I believe in the power of vulnerability. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, we have the most beautiful opportunity to find human connection, to see humanity in it’s greatest light.

All of that said, I WROTE A FUCKING BOOK, and I am so damn proud of it. It is writing from the last 5 years, and took me 2 years to compile, edit, re-edit, and re-re-edit the manuscript. The books are only available at shows. For now. We’re working on getting it in my merch store, and it will be available internationally very soon!

snapshot from the music video. can you tell it’s gonna be real uplifting?

Other great news, I DID A FUCKING MUSIC VIDEO. Can’t wait till you see it.

Also, I’M ON A FUCKING TOUR, infamously known as The Good Feelings Tour performing both my songs and poems and I have to pinch myself about how cool this is. Especially that I’m touring with my BFF, Rose McAleese, who’s got talent up the wazoo. Lastly, I miss this babe:

shut up with how attractive you are

Ahem. Pardon me, I forgot my name and my face got dumb for a minute.

Our first two shows (Seattle and Boston) both reached capacity. that’s insane. Thank you for supporting us and coming to the shows!!

There are still dates left on the East Coast and Canada- so take a looksie if you haven’t yet. West Coast tour is in the works, so please don’t cry yourself to sleep, ok?

Worcester, MA 1/25/2013 Old Oak Smithy

This is how I get ready for shows. By powdering my nose hella.

New York, NY 1/27/2013 Bluestockings

Toronto, ON 1/31/2013 The Boat

Arlington, VA 2/4/2013 Busboys and Poets

Washington, D.C 2/5/2013 & 2/6/2013 Busboys and Poets

Rochester, NY 2/9/2013 House Show

Ottawa, ON 2/12/2013 The Rainbow Bistro

Montreal, QC 2/14/2013 Le Cagibi

Burlington, VT 2/16/2013 Radio Bean

Cover art of the book is done by Crystal Barbre. The music video is done by Samantha Soo. The last photo is from a set by Zoe Rain.

Hi my babes, I’m leaving for tour in a little over a week. This is crazytown. My book is done! It’s a doozy! My first collection of poetry, titled, “500 tips for fat girls” is going to be released at The Fremont Abbey on January 19th in Seattle. From there, I go on a Northeastern tour and up to Canada! The tour dates are as follows:

GOOD FEELINGS MUSIC AND POETRY TOUR 2013
(appearing with poet Rose McAleese)

Design by Blank Studios of Bellingham, WA

Seattle, WA
1/19/2012
Fremont Abbey Grand Hall
BUY TICKETS HERE

Boston, MA
1/22/2013
Berklee College of Music

New York, NY
1/27/2013
Bluestockings

Toronto, ON
1/31/2013
The Boat

Washington, D.C
2/4/2013-2/6/2013
Busboys and Poets

Rochester, NY
2/9/2013
House Show!
(Contact poetryandpienight@gmail.com for address and details)

Ottawa, ON
2/12/2013
The Rainbow Bistro

Montreal, QC
2/14/2013
Le Cagibi

Burlington, VT
2/16/2013
Radio Bean

I’ll be annoyingly blogging about my escapades, so watch for it! Or don’t and be sad.

Here is an excerpt from my poetry collection. If you want to read my dumb rantings about body image and childhood trauma, look no further! The book will only be available on my merch site or at shows starting on January 19th, until a publishing company has a lapse in judgement.

———————————————————————————-

(from 500 tips for fat girls)

dear oprah,

When we were in 6th grade,
everyone was reading “a child called ‘it’”
even the kids who could barely read, loved that
damn book
i swallowed the pages whole because i wanted my abuse
to be
that public

if my tortures were more extreme, i could write a book and then
everyone would love me and hold me like a child or kill my father or bury me already
Once when I was 7 I took scissors to all of my clothes in the closet. I don’t know why. I made little slits in them.
maybe Oprah would give me a new life or a pair of jeans
but then i realized
everyone’s dad or uncle or brother or neighbor fucked them up
in some way
so here we are, reading ‘a child called “it”’ coping for our shit, saying
“at least he didn’t use the stovetop and burn my limbs” but i think we realized he might as well have

i wish i could make little slits in the years of my life
or put them in a book or something

                       xoxo, Mary

 ———————————————————————

Christmas came. I am a happy lady with a Christmas brooch that has a snowman on it. I’ve been able to be home a lot more and listen to Schumann, and compose, and write songs, and kiss Rachel, and watch the entire season of The Amazing Race in 3 days.

I have a lot of really neat stuff in the works. We’re shooting a music video in January! New merch is coming! My book is at the printers! Hopefully I have enough heads and hours in the day to murder my “to-do” lists.

The beautiful thing about being home for this extended period of time is the grounding. I’m feeling so charged with creative energy and I finally have the time to devote effort into my art. I’m trying not to take it for granted. Two nights ago, I was awake at 3am, as usual, and was overwhelmed with writing something on my piano. I played for near a half hour straight, and let God do what needed to be done. I rarely feel like that. Not that God isn’t in my presence when I’m writing, but that I am straight-up channeling some spiritual heaviness. As a vessel. I don’t claim to be one of those writers that “must be composing for God”; I compose for the sake of art, for the sake of vulnerability and human connection. God is with me regardless.

I wrote this in one fluid sitting. It’s not my best work, nor is the audio great, and it’s a lot of arpeggios, and you can hear the clicking of my fingers on the keys, and also I kept holding my breath on accident. But, it’s there if you’re curious.

I have received a couple emails about my “seemingly contradictory” relationship with God and my gayness. This is something I’ve thought a lot about. I’ve heard speculation about my lyrics in ‘Same Love’, my gayness, and perhaps I can answer some questions.

I grew up in a strict Pentecostal home. My parents would speak in tongues and were devout in prayer and we were at church 3-4 times a week. The church was known for ostracizing folks who were said to “go against God”. After a traumatic upbringing, and having my family shunned from the church because of my parent’s divorce, I was decidedly agnostic for many of my grade-school years.

A friend brought me to an Evangelical church in high school, known as Mars Hill, where I fell in love with the music and the bands that played on Sunday evening. The pastor was funny, charismatic, and made the bible seem simple. I was sad that my gay friends were going to hell, but the pastor said that I could still be friends with them. “Love the sinner, hate the sin” was the accepted rhetoric. When I fell in love with my first girlfriend, I recognized my sin immediately. She was also Christian. When you’re 17, and you feel like a freak already, and you’re in love with a girl, and high school is a battlefield, you can’t stand to let another part of your life down. I remember making a conscious effort to accept my sin. My recognition allowed me to repent daily. I prayed often, apologizing to God, but accepting that this is who I had always been and always would be. I still went to Mars Hill. I was never hated on, never felt rudeness from the community, but the sermons were difficult to hear.

The final line in ‘Same Love’ is “I’m not crying on Sundays”. I cried every Sunday for nearly a year in high school and afterwards. In apology to God, with guilt, with shame. I was out and proud to the world, but I had been battling Christian rhetoric inside of me for a long time. After suffering with my diagnosed bipolarity for awhile, a suicide attempt, and the war within my head and heart, something had to change.

I don’t know when it happened. I think it was when I opened the bible. Like really, really tried to read it; read Jesus’ teachings of compassion and selflessness, the beauty of the new testament. Maybe it was when I watched the documentary, “For the Bible Tells Me So”. Maybe it was when I stopped attending Mars Hill, and started going to Compline service at St. Mark’s Cathedral. But I think it really happened in prayer. Suddenly, the bible texts used against gay marriage seemed really wretched. That, when in context, were ludicrous and far-reaching. And mean! Using the bible as a tool to be self-righteous and deprave others of rights is mean. That’s sneaky bullying, you guys.

I’m also not trying to coerce anyone to Christianity, here. I think everyone has their own journey to God, and if they don’t believe in God, that’s totally cool too. I am happy for everyone that has found happiness. This is my experience, and maybe some of yours, too.

I still value my faith. My partner, Rachel, is also Christian. Now that we have equal rights as our peers, we will someday get married in a church with our friends and families there, under God, and have one bombass party.

there will be an open bar. and a bouncy castle.

xoxo
m

The Paramount, Sunday December 9th
Seattle, WA
for ‘Love Wins’, a public wedding reception celebrating the legalization of gay marriage.
FREE

Live on Jet City Stream with Marco Collins, Friday December 14th
www.jetcitystream.com
For the Jet City Stream Holiday Open House
ON AIR, 4pm

==========================================================================================================

East Coast Music and Poetry Tour
(appearing with poet Rose McAleese)
(ticket links available soon!)

Boston, MA
1/22/2013
Berklee College of Music

New York, NY
1/27/2013
Bluestockings

Toronto, ON
1/31/2013
The Boat

Washington, D.C
2/4/2013-2/6/2013
Busboys and Poets

Rochester, NY
2/9/2013
House Show!
(Contact poetryandpienight@gmail.com for address and details)

Ottawa, ON
2/12/2013
The Rainbow Bistro

Montreal, QC
2/14/2013
Le Cagibi

Burlington, VT
2/16/2013
Radio Bean

Providence, RI
2/21/2013
AS220

Worcester, MA
2/23/2013
Starship Collective

Portland, ME
2/24/2013
Dobra Tea

Portland, ME
2/25/2013
Mama’s CrowBar

Portland, ME
2/26/2013
Port Veritas

It’s real! I’m home! Our Christmas tree is up! I bought a wreath and mistletoe because I can! I like exclamation points! I want to buy a sweater with tinkly bells and possibly polar bears that maybe have hats on them!
So, I’m back in Seattle. I tackled Rachel by baggage claim and it’s pretty much been like that for the last 4 days. I’ve had two shows this last week, and have started back at my normal-people job where I get people drunk and wear cute boots and put fancy cocktails in nice glassware. The really exciting thing is that I get to work less, and focus on my art. SO LET’S GIVE A HOO-RAH FOR THAT.
TEN HOO-RAHS.

Let’s also recap the last days of the Macklemore tour!

Yes. This is Macklemore bowling. Ben Haggarty is an excellent bowler and kicked everyone’s ass except for Wanz and Dee 1. I was in last place. Out of 20 people. I do not have a future in bowling.

Lansing was a really fun show. The green room was literally covered in hand-drawn penises so I kind of hated being in there. The show itself was incredible. It was one of the only shows we’ve had where it was a significantly older crowd (older meaning a lot of flannel and beards), and the vibe reflected that.

Snap! I still look good when I’m sick!

Our next night was in
CHICAGOOOOOO!
Along with Vermont, New York, and Boston, I fell in love with Chicago. What a beautiful city. I had vegan lunch, walked around, and took pictures of the pretty river (read: instagram). I also got super sick in Chicago! I’m still mad about that. After shows, I try to come out and say hi and hug as many people as I can, but I had to leave right after I sang because I was a nauseous Annie.

“Hi, I’m an epic guest,” said no one, ever.

Madison was where I got to see MY SUPER AMAZING BFF THAT LIVES FAR AWAY, so my heart was full and happy. Thanks, Will Giles. You are the best. In non-related news, this was in our hotel lobby.
<——-

For quite a few of us, Minneapolis was our last stop. We had two incredible nights at the First Ave, met so many beautiful people and drank a fair amount of whiskey (HALF OFF DRINKS AT THE VENUE WHAT IN THE WHAT).

Ben, you can’t change me even if you kissed me on stage! But that was a really nice try!

It was really really hard to say goodbye. This is the end of The Heist tour for me, but the beginning of so many incredible personal endeavors. I’ll still get to be with the crew once in awhile for appearances and random shows, but it’s time for me to get down with my own thing (don’t take it like that, perv) and finish my book, release a music video, and plan a tour of my own. I owe Ben and Ryan the biggest debt of gratitude. I would never be in the position I am without being offered to help write ‘Same Love’. I’m going to be releasing tour dates for the East Coast very very soon (like, when I’m done writing this), and I hope you’ll come to a show that’s near you. I’m actually kind of scared to tour on my own, and there’s nothing worse than having no one show up to your performance. But I’m gonna put it all out there, ok? I’m counting on you, my babes (Sidenote: on his twitter, Aaron Carter calls all his fans, ‘babe’ and I’m trying to make it catch on for me), so get ready for the tour announcement.

Lastly, my Seattle babes (ugh this is not working), I am performing AT THE PARAMOUNT (!!!) this Sunday evening. There are a gajillion gay weddings happening this weekend, and  I’m going to sing at a free reception for all of them and cry super hard. Please come. Cry with us, celebrate with us, hug your gay dads, and your best friends, and eat cake. Then sing ‘Same Love’ with me.

xoxo

Mary

Mostly, just bowling.

And getting a cold. A cold is one big joke. It lasts for weeks and screws with you but is never as debilitating as the flu, which after 2 weeks of a head cold, you’d probably prefer puking. Nonetheless, I have cough drops and every cold medicine ever. 

Additionally, my laptop fritzed out last week, I mean, I guess it was melting for a couple months. 

Since I last wrote, we’ve traveled to Toronto, Detroit, Cleveland, and Lansing. We also had a bomb-ass Thanksgiving, courtesy of our booking agent’s adorable family (but seriously, I felt like I was in ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’ except for not being a crappy TV show).

After our time in Cleveland, a few of us perhaps had too much to drink, left the bar, and went to the casino….? Basically we just watched Ryan lose money. 

He really should’ve played the ‘Dancin’ Dolphins’.

Since our XM interview with Sway on Shade 45, we were also able to perform for Spotify. That was pretty awesome. Mostly because the prince of Saudi Arabia was there and proceeded to play ping-pong with Ray Dalton. I was also able to get my Spotify listing cleared up (no big deal, I’ve just been listed as a children’s singer from Canada with the same name and “Letters Don’t Talk” is her latest album. *That lady is so concerned about fire safety)

Toronto was an insane crowd. That line was hella long and hella cold. I can see why people live there though. I can’t wait to spend more time there; totally beautiful. In Detroit, we stayed in what looked like a fairly new hotel, but just one block down were the saddest looking vacant streets I’ve ever seen. I’ve 

heard that of Detroit, but it’s a completely different thing to witness it in person. That said, we went to an amazing bakery in the morning called Avalon, where I fell in love with everybody. 

Tonight we are in Lansing, where I am cold and sick, but going to prevail. I’m going to re-read these texts from my girlfriend and wish I had a sleeping bag.

Hello my loves.
Let’s play a game! What different belongings have I absent-mindedly forgotten at venues this last week?

phone charger, meds, tea, cold medicine, headphones, laptop charger.

geez louise. That said, I haven’t been up on my blog game and have been semi-irritable. Enough with the whining. Let’s re-cap!

I know what you’re thinking. Her teeth are real.

If you didn’t know, I was flown into New York last week to make an appearance on VH1 on the show, Big Morning Buzz. Watch it here! Super FUN!!

It was so surreal to watch it the next morning. Every thing we do, every appearance, every venue, still blows me away. I am constantly awestruck.

Immediately after VH1 (except shopping in Manhattan for a red Manhattan jacket, obvi) (if you live in Manhattan, you have to have a red jacket, I think) (I digress), we took the train to Philly to perform. It was a great show, and I wish that I had had more time to enjoy the city. : (

We had to book it right after to head to Boston, which is the other greatest place on earth. Boston was a complete blast, It was the most packed house we had since WaMu, and there were fans lined up in the cold-ass cold since 10am. Dedication, y’all.

Our kids will be in charge of ringing the churchbell. Unless the Hunchback of Notre Dame did that. Ok, screw that.

In Boston, we also met up with The Macklorettes (our hella fine, talented, sweetie-pie dancers), Wanz (Thrift-shop KING!) and Hollis Wong-Wear (Seattle hip-hop queen, wrote the chorus to ‘Wings’, ‘Cadillac’, and all-around filthy).

From there we headed to Burlington, Vermont where I want to have babies with my girlfriend and go Christmas caroling every day.

I sat in a coffeeshop (ok whatever, it was starbucks), and gazed at the beautiful Church street. We had two nights there, which is so so nice to be off the road if just for a little bit. The other thing I loved about Burlington, was how goddamn polite everyone was. Multiple fans ran up to me to shake my hand. HOW COOL IS THAT. Needless to say, I’m coming back to Burlington in February for my solo tour. It’s happening. We left for New Haven, CT, which had a fantastic crowd (someone from my youth orchestra in Snohomish County came?! what?) and we are now in New York City, once again.

This time around, I had a less pleasant experience in New York. Perhaps it was the Manhattan glow wearing off on me, or my red jacket suddenly looked like everyone else’s, or maybe I was in a different part of town, but whatever the reason, I was a total sad-bear. I was also missing both chargers and I had to pay an arm and a leg for them. I finally took a deep breath yesterday, re-treated to the hotel, ordered chicken parm to my room, and after getting a call from Mack’s manager that we were doing SIRIUS/XM radio the next morning (TODAY WHAT) and talking to my boo, I felt way way better.

I had no idea I was going to meet Sway this morning. You remember him?? The super cool dude on MTV telling you about releases and stuff you could tell your friends to pretend you were with it. (no, just me?) Today’s interview was my favorite that we’ve done thus far. It aired this morning without an archive, but we’ll hopefully have a video to post soon. I was really able to talk about my role in ‘Same Love’. I was able to share my story about being a gay Christian; coming out and still being present in the

Ugh, so cute I want to cry. Ok, I did.

Christian church and God. Plus Sway was hella genuine, funny and kind. When I arrived back to my hotel, these arrived at my room.

Also, since our smoke alarm was dying and beeping all night, Anna scored us free drinks and breakfast for the rest of our stay! BAM! Today is way better. ALSO ALSO. I have been booking shows left and right on the East Coast for January and February. Be ready for the tour schedule to show up soon!!

Check in soon, babes.

xoxo

In the last 3 hours, I have sung almost every song about New York that possibly exists.

I’m in New York. This is bananas. I know a lot has happened in the last couple months, but it never stops me from freaking out every ten seconds. I’ve always wanted to go to NYC, but never knew that it would happen like this.

Wanz and I flew out of Seattle to meet Ben and Ryan here for a secret something that you’ll all hear about soon. I am known for having a big mouth around here, so I gotta keep the cats inside of the kennel. Or bag. Or foot out of mouth. Choose your idiom!

We’ll be here just until 5pm tomorrow, and then we have to book it to Philly to perform at TDA. Don’t worry New York, I’m coming back for your cocktails. Next week, actually when we perform at IRVING PLAZA FOR TWO NIGHTS. AHHHHHHHHHH.

In other news, I really have sang every song about NYC today. My favorite being from “Annie”, and it’s totally awesomely relevant because I actually do have two bags and only three bucks, and one me. I just spent ten minutes crying to my mom about how I used to sing this song at the top of my lungs in the 4th grade, pretending I was on a stage in front of thousands. I wanted it so badly. I am a crying ball feelings and magic and never-ending gratitude that I get to live my dream.

I’m now officially back on the tour, and so happy to see everyone. I’ve also had some neat stuff happen back home. I have (finally!) finished the manuscript for my book. Really really. A lot behind schedule, but the physical copies should be in my hands by January! The incredible, extremely talented, Crystal Barbre is going to be doing sketches, and I feel so privileged to have her on this project. I’m also in the midst of planning a real, legit solo tour! My partner in crime, Rose McAleese, just got her book of poetry published! Rose and I have been friends since we were in Youth Speaks Seattle, an incredible poetry organization for young writers. Our show will consist of my songs, probably some bad jokes, booty-shaking, and both of our poems! Tour is shaping up to be on the East Coast between late January to early February. I’ll be posting shows as they are confirmed!

Here’s a dumb video of Wanz and I fresh off the plane:

Because I’m sappier than a mother dropping her kids off to kindergarten,
I have to tell you how much I love weddings. I love singing, I love playing piano, 
I love wedding dresses, I LOVE HAPPY TEARS.

A thought occurred to me as I was on my 13th hour straight at my bartending gig,
all sweaty and exhausted, very close to collapsing and breaking down.

Perhaps, I could really be a singer-songwriter for a living. Maybe, just, maybe people
might want to hire me to perform at their stuff. Maybe I could go on tour for weeks
and then sing at weddings the rest of the time. Why the hell not.

Also, people can totally get gay married here, and nothing makes me happier/cry more
than watching 2 people use their civil/inalienable/human rights to seal their love.

With that said, there is a new “weddings” tab ^ up top, with a variety of options for your
wedding. Contact me with any questions, y’all. 

Also, this is MY FAVORITE BLOG EVER dedicated to only lesbian wedding photos and so 
I spend hours at home annoying my girlfriend with “AW THEY’RE SO CUTE TOGETHER”
“GREAT TASTE IN DECOR” “I LOVE MASON JARS TOO”

and it was totally awesome in every way, because I used to be a bad creeper there and wistfully look at women who always thought I was straight because my eyeliner is and was perpetually flawless.

Okay. I know this is about to be hella pictures. The night was just so incredible, and I can’t believe how well Nate Gowdy did documenting the entire night. You can get in contact with him here and look at more fantastic pictures. Thanks for the incredible photos, Nate!

AND YOU CAN, AND YOU CAN, AND YOU CAN, AND WE CAN ALL GET MARRIED BECA– USE THIS STATE IS SO GODDAMN EQUAL AND I LOVE IT WITH ALL MY HEART.

Last night’s agenda consisted of Rachel and I hopping around town, meeting with friends, trying to figure out the easiest path of consumption between us and whiskey. We started at The Showbox around 9pm, on account of I made really great pasta with wine beforehand. Showbox had Dan Savage and his husband dancing on-stage making me cry. Actually crying a lot with all of our friends. A great mix of music and updates, and so many high-fives and hugs. I miss being on tour with the Macklemore crew, for sure, but I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.

We departed for the hill, and naturally went to The Wildrose (one of the only remaining LESBIAN bars in the country), and totally sang “Same Love” together. Rachel does a really great impression of a tall, 

Rachel’s family in support! They voted!!

straight, white dude. The place erupted in cheers when we kissed during the instrumental break, which, in my opinion, really made the song. Why don’t I get to make out with my boo onstage when I’m on tour!?

After being treated like lesbian royalty for two hours and watching the president’s speech, we bounced and headed toward this overjoyed, boisterous, intoxicated, and crying mass of people. Rachel and I kissed in the street! We hugged in the street! We laughed and cheered and then cried of happiness. Rachel said softly to me, in the midst of all of this, “We’re going to have the most beautiful wedding.”

My family! Everyone here voted too!

You guys, I know I never shut up about it, “Duh, you’re gay. You have a gay song. You talk about being gay all THE TIME”. But it’s really not about being gay. It’s that I am so goddamn head-over-heels, fire in the entire of my heart, in love with my girlfriend. And we get to have the same rights as our friends. And that’s what it’s about. 

So, obviously, I haven’t been on tour! I got home about a week ago, and slammed right back into regular-people life, which I am totally ok with. My boss (at the bar I work at) was on a much-need vacation, so I kind of worked hella. I literally just unpacked yesterday. The great thing was having the Ellen show air the day that I got back. I called our favorite restaurant in the whole wide world, Tutta Bella in Columbia City, and we totally watched it there.

I didn’t get to talk to Ellen, and I don’t think she ever knew my name or announced it, but that woman is like, CELEBRITY, and has done everything for the gay community, so I’m totally cool about an ego bruise.

pathetic, mary.

Do you want to see her parking spot? Sorry guys, that’s all I got for you,

As of now, I am trying to not get too comfortable to routine, since I’ll be leaving for the East Coast in a couple days. But I totally caught up on Project Runway and I’m really sad that neither Melissa or Fabio won. 
Life is hard. 

Love you guys, and y’know,

fuck yeah for gay rights.

I was added to the East Coast portion of the Macklemore tour.

Which, unfortunately means I’ve had to cancel a few of my Seattle shows. I am sad to announce I won’t be involved in the Hugo House show any longer. But I am totally excited to explore the East Coast and sing my heart out to you. I’ll add these updates as they come. Can’t wait to serenade y’all.

Also Cali is hella hot right now. I hate heat.

Holy shit. I can’t even keep up with the momentum of my career/gay heaven.

On top of having stellar shows in Santa Cruz and San Diego, having drinks with lovely poetry friends, bonding with my incredible tour crew, I have two INCREDIBLE announcements.

Wednesday, I got to hang with the beautiful, stylish, extremely talented, TEGAN AND SARA. I literally had a gay heart attack. I was able to hear their soundcheck, front row, with no other people watching. I had to pinch myself. We spoke about working together in the future, and I would love to have that materialize.

So that was kind of the greatest day of my life other than the first day I met Rachel.

In other massive gay news for Mary Lambert, I’m TOTALLY GOING ON ELLEN DEGENERES. 

Tuesday. 4pm. Singing “Same Love”. THIS IS REAL. THIS IS ACTUALLY REALLY REALLY HAPPENING.

I can’t believe my life. My first thoughts about the show were instantly about how many people will be able to see my face and hear my voice, and all things very ego-centric. It really didn’t reach me until today, when the idea of what a massive platform Ben, Ryan, and I are on. The very idea that we are loudly vocalizing gay rights, that I get to sing about how much I love my girlfriend, and the hope that it will reach an unbelievable amount of viewers around the country is almost unfathomable. I couldn’t have even projected “Same Love” to take us this far. I am so utterly blessed. If you don’t believe that we’re going on (I still need a reminder), here’s the link!

http://www.ellentv.com/episodes/steve-harvey-macklemore-and-ryan-lewis/

I am also exhausted and want to whine about the fact I have not had a real meal in days. You guys, I am so sick of chex mix and beef jerky. Whatever, YOLO. We’re getting up earlybird style and getting ear molds made in L.A. for our show packs (in-ears). Basically, it’s essential for me, cause y’all don’t sing the last chorus right, ever. But you know, I would way much rather you sing with me, on account of marriage equality needs all the voices in the universe ever. So keep on singing!!

Going to bed! Nice to meet you, San Diego.

IMore and more driving. This tour is like a marathon. Like a sitting marathon.

I don’t think I’ve sat this much ever. I’ve recruited the dancers (who’ve resumed the tour with us! YAY!) to help me with my sweet dance moves. So far I’ve only had one concussion. 

San Francisco was a blast and a half. I can’t believe I was able to sing in the legendary Fillmore. So so humbled. I started crying before I even got on stage; obviously. I was more excited to pee in the same bathroom as Jimi Hendrix than anything else. I mean, I’m sure they’ve cleaned it since then, but whatever.

I was approached by one of my twitter “soul sisters” that night. I cry almost every show, for one reason or another, but San Francisco really made a soft spot in my already cushioned heart. She told me that she had played “Same Love” for a friend of hers, and the next day, the friend came out to her family. I’m getting to a place in my career that I’m realizing there’s no turning back now.  I know it seems ludicrous to think about: like “Mary, why would you want to go back to bartending and waitressing and playing shows to 5 people at a shitty venue and getting wasted all the time?” But there’s a sort of anonymity that I won’t be able to ever have again. It’s like I’m finally committing to doing music for real. Not just having my Bachelors of Music, but doing this for my life, pursing it as a career. It’s a daunting feeling. I’m going to own it. 

I am officially homesick though. Seeing Rachel made it apparent that I need to put on my big girl panties and learn how to tour like a real performer.

Highlight: My boo flew out to see the show! She rented a room in a castle for us, no big deal.

For the record, San Francisco is hella stressful. If you ever considered renting a car or buying a car there -don’t.

EVEN IF IT’S A CUTE VW BUG BECA– USE YOU’VE WANTED ONE SINCE YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL AND HAD ONE FOR YOUR BARBIES.

In addition to playing a sold-out show at The Fillmore, we had a day off to hang around SF. I’ve barely traveled in my life, so it was a much needed day to be a lame-o tourist. 

The highlight of the day for me was visiting City Lights Bookstore, where a ton of the first beat poets used to hangout and wear weird hats. Swoon.

We’re currently in Arcata, CA. At Humboldt University. On a Tuesday. Performing at 12am. For 200 people. It’s like a bomb-ass house show. This isn’t lame, I’m just tired. 

As soon as we’re done here, we jet to Santa Cruz for the morningtime. I need 20 soy latte somethings (Sidenote: I’ve been putting honey in my lattes, and it’s improved my quality of life, drastically).

We are doing something very special in the morning that I’m not at liberty to talk about- but I can say that I am living the greatest lesbian week of all time. 

Also, I just found out that Macklemore’s (INCREDIBALLS) girlfriend is driving the van to Santa Cruz and letting me sleep on the tour bus, so I can perform well tomorrow. With that, I bid you adieu, and leave to answer 68 emails. Mostly from Michelle Obama. What a babe.

I wish that I could accurately describe how incredible it was

It’s official. I’m in love with Oregon. I already knew that I loved Portland. Great food, great strip clubs, great bike paths, etc. But I didn’t know that I loved the rest of Oregon.   The upside about driving in a van that’s trailing the tour bus, is that we have a lot of freedom. We’re an autonomous group (Hollis, Wanz, Andrew, Natalie, and myself). We performed in Bend last night, which rocked super hard.

Jon jon and I having dranks

And then we went out drinking which also rocked. hard. There was a lot of jameson that occurred.

I believe I got back to our hotel room and wrote a song about fried chicken with Ray. Pancakes were consumed in the morning. I am still in awe of the people I get to spend my time with for these weeks. Not a single person is lacking in talent, beauty, kindness, grace, or support.

Alsoalso. In Washington state, most people should have gotten their ballots in the mail. I can’t stress how important and vital to civil rights it is to vote. Please, please vote. Vote for love. Vote for me, your cousin, your uncle, your co-worker.

We’re in the middle of soundcheck in Eugene, OR. The theater looks fantastic, and there’s a great line of fans outside. CAN’T WAIT!

Directed by Sam Soo (Hit the Streets- Vancouver, CAN)

Today is Monday! And that means it’s our first and only day off from the tour to be home. It also means I get to catch up on Project Runway. Thank God. BUT SERIOUSLY WHO IS GOING TO FASHION WEEK?! It’s anybody’s game right now. I also have a crap-ton to pack, so I’ll be doing that.

The crew and I spent the weekend in Vancouver with 2 sold-out shows at The Vogue. Vancouverites are fucking insane. The energy both nights was so hype- from start to finish. We had a little down time on Sunday to shop, wander, what-have-you, so obviously my lesbian senses wandered me to the gay district.

It was really tempting to hop the fence, just so I could jump out and scream “I SAME LOVE YOU” to quiet dog-walkers.

And of course, what gay district wouldn’t be complete without a massive fucking community garden? It’s so beautiful. Why can’t Seattle have a community garden next to Babeland or something?

Vancouverites also party hella hard. I saw at least 6 fights on Saturday night, the best of which was a verbal altercation I am calling “The Tale of Two Jessicas”.

While I was away, the warm and kind folks at Jet City Stream, posted this beautiful video of my solo acoustic version of “Same Love”.

Now I must pack and clean and try not to cry about how much I’m going to miss my girlfriend.

Today, in bad ideas for breakfast that still taste pretty great: tuna salad.

Also, and likely more importantly, THE SAME LOVE VIDEO HIT A MILLION.

                               (duh, i had to find the screenshot where i’m in it, obvi)
wowowowowow.
I woke up this morning and snuggled my girlfriend extra long and teared up thinking of all the stories people have been sharing with me; folks offering their coming out stories, tragedies of being bullied, or beaten, or ostracized by their families. It is an epidemic, but we can change things. I believe that with all of my being. I hope you all are staying strong, and will continue to push forward with societal change.

Macklemore, Ryan, the crew and I head on tour in less than a week. I’m nervous. I’m in a place in my career that I never could have fathomed. My girlfriend texted me to come home the other night because videos of Ben performing “Same Love” live in Europe were up on youtube. I was in tears (shocking, I know). It’s thousands of people singing words that I wrote. That’s insane. It’s something I’ve consistently dreamt of as a performer, but due to the improbability, I’ve always left it as a dream.
This is absolutely surreal. I appreciate all the immense support that’s been coming in, and while I’m not able to respond to everything, know that I read and feel every bit of love radiating out and send it right back.

Before I leave for tour, I’m doing a last hurrah at the Fremont Abbey. One of my dearest friends in the whole wide world, Rose Estelle McAleese, is releasing her book at a beautiful show called The Round. I’ll be playing pretty songs and making myself cry. It’s this Tuesday at 8pm. See you there.

Additionally, I’ve released a song through an organization, Protosong. I listened to the playlist I was asked to contribute to, and even if I wasn’t on it, I would be listening to it 100 times a day. Beautiful, beautiful work by incredible local singer-songwriters. Protosong is donating 70 percent of the proceeds to efforts for clean water. The other 30 goes to the artists that contributed. And and and you can pay what you want for it. For serious.
pretty please download the playlist.

I’m going to go back to my terrible tuna salad breakfast decision and think long and hard about why I eat like a pregnant woman. 

ARE YOU READY FOR ME TO SERENADE YOUR GODDAMN PANTS OFF?!

At rehearsal today, I tried to convince Ben and Ryan that I should enter on a unicorn.
I don’t know why they were so against it. I also demanded rhinestones and sequins on my mic, along with a projection of a rainbow on my face. duh.

Hope you like this video- I’m a bridesgroomsmaid! Also I’m holding a sparkler trying not to burn anything down.

AAAAND TA-DAAAAH! My canvas bags arrived! They’re real cute.

carry all your lesbian shit in here; like a softball or a Sylvia Plath book

This adorable thing is available on my merch site, along with sweet Mary Lambert T-shirts and my entirely sob-fest of a DEBUT ALBUM, called “Letters Don’t Talk”. If you’re interested in crying really hard, you can listen, here
take a peep (not a peep show idiot).

See you at the shows, y’all.

I CAN’T WAIT.

Hey guys. New stuff!

Just received super cool, totally rad, great-for-carrying-groceries-in-seattle-because-plasticbags-are-the-devil canvas tote bags! They’re pretty fly. They will be available in the merch store this week!

ALSOALSOALSO I have a show next saturday with freaking Courtney Marie Andrews. This girl is a total goddess, and if I wasn’t playing in the show, I would probably still be there just to hear her.
Check the faceland invite, RSVP if you wanna, tell your friends if you wanna, cause I’d really love to see you there!

hugs and kisses and puppies and apple pie and letters to my grandma, and just my grandma in general,

Mary

The generous kickstarter donors (who funded my beautiful EP) will get their CDs starting Monday of next week. And I gotta say, those personalized letters with found objects look pretty darn neato. Did you think anyone would ever own so many stickers of cats? Probably not. And no one ought to.

If you are pea-green jealous that those kickstarter angels got a CD and you didn’t, then dry your tears! You can purchase the physical CD here. You can buy the digital album here. Now stop whining, you sissy.

We filmed the “Same Love” video on Tuesday, and it was so incredibly wonderful. I think it’s going to be a big hit.

Lighting a sparkler! I’m glad Ben didn’t burn my hair. Thanks Ben!

It was the first real music video I’ve ever been in, and it was an honor to be apart of it. My back-up vocalist, Maiah Manser got a large part in the video as well! Glad to share that with her. It’s not like she’s a model or anything…

oh, me, just raising my hands in the air to fend off the hoards of people attempting to swoon me.

I start rehearsals for Mack’s tour that kicks off in October, so if you don’t have your tickets…like, get on that, bro.

I also wanted to announce that I will be releasing a brand new song in conjunction with protosong, which is a music based charity that donates all proceeds to a different cause every month or so. They do this by getting really fucking awesome bands and singers to write and record a brand new song all compiled into a mind-blowing playlist. Other groups in this crazy good line-up are:

Damien Jurado, Lemolo, Big Sur, The Cellar Door, Noah Gunderson, Kris Orlowski, Campfire OK, and Motopony. I am honored to be on this playlist, and can’t wait to see how much money we raise for clean water!!

In other news, I am really good at catching fruit flies with one hand.

WOAH! Thank you! I receive some income from the songs I sell, so if you want to buy one, that’s like buying me a frozen pizza. And you know I love frozen pizzas. Freschetta anyone?

If you want to purchase songs to put on your phone or computer and listen to a sad girl whine about sad things, please PURCHASE ON BANDCAMP. Bandcamp is awesome for musicians and really user friendly. Thanks for buying my music, dogs.

Where should I go? Do you know a booker or have a big house for house shows? Do you have a kitchen for kitchen shows? I want this to be as personal as possible. Contact me or my booker!

Bookingmarylambert@gmail.com

https://www.facebook.com/events/255080747932022/

BELLINGHAM!   https://www.facebook.com/events/209907205804315/

EVERETT!       https://www.facebook.com/events/425046264200837/